weddings were arranged when children were born. The groom’s parents would have a liaison that would obtain records of birthdate from the potential bride’s family. From there, a Chinese astrologer would use the Chinese zodiac to see if both of the birthdays would align and make a good match for marriage. Once the astrologer determined that they were a good match, the parents would arrange for them to be married on a specific date. When the potential couple came of age to marry, the parents would exchange letters discussing the details of the ceremony and a time for the families to meet and make a proposal.
The groom’s family would bring a ‘Grand Gift” to the bride’s family in even numbers to indicate fertility and wealth tradition. One of the main gifts that the groom’s family gives is a “Double Happiness” or “Phoenix and Dragon” cakes. In this cake, the Phoenix symbolizes the bride and the Dragon symbolizes the groom. They are baked with the Dragon and Phoenix on them and are sometimes filled with lotus seed paste, red bean paste or green bean paste. The groom presents the bride’s family and then the cakes would be sent out to friends and relatives along with invitations and would be presented to their ancestors during their worship. In today’s society, modern couples would serve this cake at the reception. may present parents with beautiful letters in honor of the engagement.
The Wedding Day Ceremony Rituals and Tea In Chinese custom, red is the main color of the wedding day. The color red represents joy. The color red permeates throughout the wedding décor. The flowers, wedding hall, the bridal house, reception area, invitations and even the wedding dress itself would be red. The morning of the wedding day starts with a hair dressing or Shang Tou ritual for the bride. A “good luck woman”, who has living parents, a spouse and lots of children, would dress the hair in a bun for the bride. The groom would have a capping or Jia Guan ritual performed by his family. These rituals symbolize their transformation into adulthood. After the morning rituals, they would play the century’s old fun wedding Door game where the groom would be blocked from seeing the bride and would be tested and tricked in jest by the friends of the bride. The groom would try to eventually “bargain” his way in by giving friends a red envelope with Lin Shi (token money). When the bride is ready, she would hold a red umbrella (to ward off bad spirits) on the way to her transportation and relatives would throw rice and beans on her to attract the attention of the gold chicken (symbol for good fortune). When she arrives at the groom’s house the loud noises of firecrackers, gongs and drums fill the house. The bride would then jump over a lit iron pot to bring prosperity and to fight off bad spirits. Once everyone has arrived, the wedding ceremony begins.
During the ceremony, the wedding vows are exchanged and then the couple kneels to the heaven and earth, the ancestral tablets and their parents. In modern times, instead of kneeling, they bow. The bride then would serve tea to the parents and relatives from oldest generation to youngest. When the bride serves the tea, she receives gifts such as Li Shi money or jewelry. The last serving of tea indicates the end of the wedding and ceremony rituals.
The Reception Food and Its Meaning The reception meal is one of the most important meals of the wedding ceremony. The meal itself contains many symbols of well wishes for the newlywed couple. Entrees like fish, pigeon, and chicken cooked in red oil, lobster and roast suckling pig are commonly served as the main courses for the Chinese wedding banquet. Each dish has a specific meaning for the newlywed couple. The fish represents wealth and abundance. The pigeon represents peace in the future. The roast suckling pig (served whole) represents the bride’s purity. Having cooked chicken in red oil and lobster together at a wedding banquet represents the Yin and Yang elements of the dragon (male) and phoenix (female) and shows balance in the family. Desert would entail Dragon and Phoenix cake (in modern times) and desert bun with lotus seeds inside. To learn more about the tradition visit China Bridal
